this is what happens when i feel guilty about neglecting my blog

My thoughts are far too scattered for an intelligent or even coherent blog. So here are some self-observations that will have to hold me over until I can be a responsible, introspective blogger:

§ Pretzels make me sick. I get this from my mom. But I eat them in large quantities anyway. I get that from Mom too.

§ My secret ambition is to become fluent in a fictional language (such as elvish) and devote my entire life and career to the mastery of that language. Then, when an epic movie trilogy is made that uses that language, I can be the person that gets invited to interviews that will be aired in the 6+ hours of special DVD features … not that I have ever watched 6+ hours of special DVD features and seen interviews with a fictional language expert in them … [hangs head now that secret ambition is not-so-secret anymore]

§ I really like the number 5 and multiples of it. Unless it’s 14 or 19 or 28—I really like those three numbers (3 is a great number, too). But I do not like 2. Or 4, 8, or 11 either. Especially 4. It is a smug number. (I like 9 as well … you can make a perfect square when you have 9 objects … I really respect that about the number 9) ...

§ I am an interrupter, and I use brackets, dashes, and parentheses to do so. Dashes are for straight-up interruptions—I have a horrible memory and I forget stuff if I have to wait to say what I am thinking. Parentheses are used for clarification purposes (just in case I don’t think I’m clear enough). And brackets are used to narrate for myself … I may or may not hold up hands around my face to make brackets while I talk, just so I can be super-animated [rolls eyes at ridiculosity of the idea of narrating for herself]

§ My favorite animals include but are not limited to the following: pigs, primates, squirrels, platypi, and penguinos (flamingos, koalas, and giraffes also make that list).

§ One day I will own a golden retriever. He will wear a plaid collar and I will call him Patrick O’Flannigan.

§ I have never felt more irresponsible than I am feeling right now ... The fact that I have 30pg paper and a history test this week are probably contributing to that guilt

[gives up on thinking of witty conclusion to blog so she can go to sleep and avoid thinking about her irresponsible time-management habits]

faith, deeds, and a giant two-by-four: act i, scene ii...

CARRIE: “My greatest desire is to return to Africa. My greatest fear is that I never will.” [mopes]

GOD: [slaps her across with the two-by-four of Opportunity-If-You’re-Willing-To-Take-The-Initiative-Fueled-By-Faith]

END SCENE, TO BE CONTINUED IN HIS TIME BY HER INITIAIVE

dear february 4th (today's pertinent definitions)

awkward (adj): socially uncomfortable, unsure and constrained in manner

meeting (n): a casual or unexpected convergence

hindsight (n): an understanding of the nature of an event after it has happened

funny (adj): amusing, arousing or provoking laughter